Sunday, June 19, 2011

Advice Unwanted

How Strangers Can Ruin Your Day!

Who are these people? I'm working my butt off on some project and some stranger comes along and watches me, then tells me all about exactly how I'm doing it wrong (or at least not the most competent way), how I ought to do it, what I ought to be using and how much I've already screwed the project up by doing things incorrectly so far. Where do these idiots come from and why do they think I give a damn? What makes them believe I give them and their unwanted opinions any kind of credence at all?

And yet, I will stand there hypnotized, nodding astutely and saying "that's what I thought". Vomit. What am I thinking? What I want to do is smack them upside the head WWE style and say "Shut up! If you're so damned experienced and skilled, you do it, 'cause I've got stuff I'd much rather do." Certainly, I have other things I'd rather complete than listen to them spew out... like whatever blasted project I'm knee-deep in when they inexorably come trodding in!

Now, I don't mind my friend coming along and making "misery loves company" jokes as I labour along, since I've seen him head-down over some wretched project many a time. He's earned the right to razz me a bit and I've razzed right back a time or two. That's fine. But these... people… just arrogant prickly rats?

My teacher at School used to lecture me about "the right tool for the job" when I was a kid. Most of the time, the right tool for my job has been a word processor or a pen and a notebook. What do I know about tools? Well, I do know which end to hold onto and that the tool should be doing the work, not me. So, I plod along when scraping paint and sanding wood and things of that nature, letting the tools do the work and listening to other bitch about how slow I am.

And, of course, the free-advice folks seem to be most attracted to the slow-moving workers, as if doing your work at a firm and agreeable pace means that you're in over your head and that you need their unwelcoming and supposedly unbiased help without delay.

Actually, I don't. I prefer to make my own mistakes and learn from them, not make someone else's mistakes and then be annoyed. Bugger off you irritating chatterers. If I screw up, you can laugh all you like, but please don't say "I told you so," because I'd prefer it if you didn't tell me in the first place. Want to help me out? Keep your mouth shut. simple!


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