Wednesday, May 30, 2012

Bad Girls (1981) - Ron Jeremy & the Babes !!

Vintage Soft Core Bad Babes Romp in the Woods !

4 hot-looking, centerfold models including Penthouse Pet of those days Michelle Bauer go on a rafting holiday in a woodsy paradise, where they spend a lot of time sunbathing, taking nude pictures of one another and experimenting with (you guessed it right) - lesbian sex. They are so busy with themselves, they appear to have forgotten to bring their raft. 

One of them, I think her name was Bo, happens across the outrageously virile Thomas (John Leslie) chopping wood and they do an impromptu nasty in the forest. All this time the big boy of porndom – a young Ron Jeremy, wearing a hilarious Boy Scout uniform peers voyeurously at the four (silicon free) hot bodes unawares. 

Later, they discover that an old gothic dungeon stands nearby and go to take pictures of it. Unluckily for them the dungeon is apparently still in operation, run by a man aptly named "Judge" with a secret cult of well-endowed studs and insatiable voracious nymphs. The "bad girls" are held guilty for trespassing, taken prisoner and indoctrinated into a polite sort of sexual S & M servitude. 

Ron Jeremy, it turns out, is a member of the same cult – he then has his way with one of the women before she has been "conditioned," and for this carnal offense he is put into exile. He gets his vengeance, though. He sneaks some aphrodisiac incense into the dungeon which has the effect of compelling everyone to have sex continuously - as opposed to before, when everyone was constantly having sex. 

After a very long, moist and slobbery orgy (that would put Osho to shame) everyone falls asleep and Ron steals into the dungeon, wakes the "bad girls" and helps them escape. In the end Ron, a bearded stud and the four nude women row off into the sunset in their raft - actually they didn’t forget it after all. 

You know, I really shouldn’t watch these things but this was on the Hotel VOD. With a free credit in my tab, I was curious (ok, I’ll admit) tempted to watch it though it’s almost 21 years vintage!! Apparently, when this movie was released in 1981, it was considered too adult in a few states across the US and went chop, chop, chop before the populace could savor the action! 

As a subject matter though, it’s hard enough to cultivate healthy attitudes about sex and intimacy and the significance of conciliation and communication in the context of a caring loving relationship, without distracting myself with immature amorous visions of a titillating pubescent fantasy. 

What’s more, many people I know find these films (whether softcore or hardcore) to be intensely offensive. There. That’s the hypocrisy. Sex wouldn't sell so well if it was indeed so bad, would it? 

Anyway, taking that out of the way – just think? Why can’t real life be more like this movie ? Who cares about intimacy and communication, dating and nuptials when we could all agree to live in a world liberally peppered with nubile, bikini-clad nymphomaniacs single-mindedly driven in the pursuit of relentless carnal pleasure? Tempting isn’t it?? Okay, never mind. We’ll save this discussion for an other day!!

Monday, May 28, 2012


Friday, May 25, 2012

Earthquake Scares !!

Surviving A Quake!!

Well, this post is quite late!! I was supposed to get this turned in on time along with 3 reviews for a magazine last month, honest, but then we had this little, creepy earthquake off the coast in Indonesia and then the subsequent Tsunami scares (especially about Japan) on the net and TV, countless twitter warnings, radio announcements,…maybe you read about it...

I was stuck in my beach front hotel room – momentarily feeling dizzy when it happened!! Seconds later, the alarms and car horns go wild, the phones start ringing, the road below is an explosion of worried people and I have this crazy neighbor – a harried American expat in my adjoining room banging my door – wanting to know if it indeed was a Bin Laden quake in action !! Apparently someone had tweeted him this!!

Anyway, apart from the typical “world spinning around you” feeling and “things falling down all over” picture, I was very lucky in that none of my stuff was damaged nor did I get hurt but it did knock me off my stride for not just that day but for about a full week. It was the first time I had felt an earthquake in full glory!! C’mon, a 6.9 on the Richter scale followed by constant tremors & aftershocks (both terrifying) puts a lot of things into a new perspective - more so especially when you are on the 38rd floor with no electricity, alone, confused and they also switch off the lifts for I am told precautionary reasons (probably, they don't want you to run away without paying the bills! )

Well, it hasn’t changed my mind about travelling to quake prone countries or staying in beach front high rise hotels or on very high floors (a personal choice), but it did make me think some more about the role the Internet and the Media plays in my life, and how I, (and all of us) use it to help make sense of ourselves and our our own different ways. The incessant chatter on the net and on the Telly immediately after the quake was an insightful episode but that's the sort of reflective essay that's better suited for an other time or another blog...for now, let's say that it was pretty ‘nightmare of the elm street’ like scary and I am happy to be alive to tell you this story!! 

Friday, May 18, 2012

Driving Across Oblivion !

Driving Solo on the Surreal Highway to Nowhere

I am on the highway to nowhere on a lousy rental car but thank god, at least its big, the AC works and it doesn’t stutter. And the CD deck is belting out Thom Yorke’s 'Clocks' with pristine clarity!! Or maybe I am hearing it inside my head!! 

The road is wide and seemingly nice but I can’t find any car or truck for company, I probably should have covered more than 250 miles! That has been my feeling for the whole 3 hours I have driven through it. It is not a place you want to break down after dark. 

Small derelict houses and burnt trucks tucked in by the side of the road. The scenery seems like a scrawny sick patient that sticks up into the mountains and it's nothing but crumbling, old coal mines. Most of them are practically ghost relics and there's nothing in between them but this empty highway, twisting through the hills with only enough light to keep you on the road. Sinister and weirdly disheartening. 

And the hills do look like a brown green wall from a distance, covered in some sort of pine or eucalyptus so dark-needled that it looks like the folds of land are sheathed in a dark gloomy mantle, it's an uninhabited plateau all around. But that's not all. 

I have been driving across this sort of strange, empty plateau until I came closer to the brown wall. If you drive from the East you will cross the weird, alkalai, patchwork desert terrain first, it looks endless and awful and then there's this strange, dark line on the Western horizon, miles after you've left the last gas station. It grows and grows into this massive wall that stretches across the entire horizon. It looks like a curtain of brown impassable stone. I can see nothing ahead. Just this doom and gloom wall and me. If you were lost here, you would probably fall down and cry, sure that you would die here. 

It’s really leaving an impression on me. I didn't have any idea there were place like this in real life, just in movies. Driving solo and long distance in a foreign country can be a surreal experience..this seems exactly like the one!! Like the truck accident I saw in the morning. Something really bizarre about watching the rising trail of burning oil and molten metal from the middle of the endless hills and a long, winding road.... It really did seem like a movie. 

Considering the amount of sleep I got last night, is this a dream....I am really astonished at how extraordinary outback country is. I never thought I'd say this, but I think driving across tany cavernous highway is a dreamlike trip all of you should take sometime. Ok..let me get back on the road..again!! The Journey is not yet over!!!
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