We all reach points in our lives where we find that we are seemingly no longer satisfied with what we have; we feel something is either lacking or something needs to much more in our lives. It’s a frustrating period. This can happen anywhere, anytime, at any period of your life but mostly seems to appear after we have crossed our first 25 years of existence. Suddenly or gradually, there is something significantly missing - in your job, in your career, and of course, in your marriage and in your relationships, particularly if it’s a long-term one.
Monday, April 22, 2019
Searching for Satisfaction
Sometimes, Life is all about a fresh perspective
We all reach points in our lives where we find that we are seemingly no longer satisfied with what we have; we feel something is either lacking or something needs to much more in our lives. It’s a frustrating period. This can happen anywhere, anytime, at any period of your life but mostly seems to appear after we have crossed our first 25 years of existence. Suddenly or gradually, there is something significantly missing - in your job, in your career, and of course, in your marriage and in your relationships, particularly if it’s a long-term one.
We all reach points in our lives where we find that we are seemingly no longer satisfied with what we have; we feel something is either lacking or something needs to much more in our lives. It’s a frustrating period. This can happen anywhere, anytime, at any period of your life but mostly seems to appear after we have crossed our first 25 years of existence. Suddenly or gradually, there is something significantly missing - in your job, in your career, and of course, in your marriage and in your relationships, particularly if it’s a long-term one.
For the person who suddenly finds himself or herself in this peculiar dilemma and who is no longer content and satisfied with what he or she already has - the struggle to find happiness, to "find oneself" again, is often filled with emotional upheaval along a treacherous tumultuous road of self-loathing, discovery, acceptance and pain.
I have been there or maybe I am still there – stuck in the perpetual feeling of being at the crossroads of life and not knowing which road to take or not take any road at all. Self-help books, motivational coaches, psychiatrists, psychologists, and new-age gurus don’t really help either, they simply amplify your state of limbo and very rarely cure you. After all, it’s in their vested interest that you remain uncertain about your future and buy their bestsellers and watch their sermons.
So, after wasting a lot of money besides costly trials and errors, I accidentally re-discovered a simple childhood exercise that I practice most nights now, usually when I go to bed before I sleep. All I do is listen to music on my earphones, close my eyes and concentrate on the real me and the people or things that matter to me now. It’s focusing on the true "spirit" of what I am all about and every other thought or emotion is set to rest while I just relax.
If you do this often enough, you will be surprised at how intimately you get to know yourself. Some of those heavy, philosophical, emotional or silly, irrational questions that you are always beating yourself up with, quietly dissolve into nothingness. and you’ll soon see them for what they are, just thoughts. Unnecessary thoughts we have cultivated and cultured, and nurtured, and jealously guarded throughout the moments, days or even years of our busy lives - until we are lost in them and trick ourselves into thinking they are a reality. They are nothing. They are bubbles on the face of the turbulent sea. They are not real.
So, what is it we "want?" We all want to be loved. We all want to have passion, satisfaction, and pleasure in our lives. But if we waste our time searching for whatever it is we think we have to have in order to be happy, or passionate, or pleasurable, or satisfied; we will always be forever lost, living an unhappy complicated life.
The problem with wanting something is that we are instantly limiting our choices, our chances at pleasure and happiness. Suddenly, we cannot be happy because we don't have "this" or "that." Or we are thinking too much, too often about the future and not relishing the moment. What a waste isn’t it? Not appreciating the real beauty of today for an uncertain wish of tomorrow.
What if we just decided to "be" happy, or passionate, or pleasurable - without depending on "something" to get us there? Can we do that? Of course, we can. If we just let go of what we "want" - then the whole universe is open to us. It's like suddenly losing your job or just seeing your current job with a fresh perspective and realizing that now you can be anything you want to be! It's like giving away all you own and then having nothing to lose. In Zen, they say, "Leap from the mountain" and you will be free...so go ahead and jump!
Labels:
Commentary,
Fulfillment,
happiness,
Love,
Relationships,
Slice of Life
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