Make Love, Live and Let Live

What two consenting adults do with each other is none of the world's business

Sex is good! From the smallest insects to giant whales, every living thing has sex and copulates, well almost if you exclude the types that reproduce asexually. There is something elementary about sex, it’s a need, a want and a necessity but in spite of being on top of the evolutionary ladder, we still act as prudes when we decide to discuss our attitudes towards and sexual liberation. Moral correctness some would say, others would say its indecent. In my opinion, we are hypocrites actually, ambiguously obsesssed with victorian concepts of sex and reluctant to embrace the evolution of sex. 

Don’t get me wrong. I am not supporting debauchery nor do I support the hateful violent acts that are committed in the name of sex. I also respect the right everyone has to not be subjected to ideas and images that one finds objectionable. But at the same time, I hate attempts to stomp out so-called "deviant" behaviour, sometimes in the name of law and order, and other times as preservation of the species, or health education, or just because the holy books don’t advocate it. 

Time was, just the suspicion that a person engaged in same-sex activities could lead to being fired from a job, outcast from the community, and subject to harassment and persecution. It’s still happening. While many of the overt attempts to oppress (LGBTQ) sex that falls outside a strict definition of a conjugal man – woman bliss has ceased, we still feel the aftereffects of what once was. There is still a certain stigma attached to non-missionary sex between same-sex or even sex between unmarried people. While sometimes this stigma is expressed in untoward curiosity, and sometimes expressed as disdain, it is present and we feel its effects. 

We must remind ourselves that, no matter what we might hear, there are people who break through these boundaries and they must be accepted. Who decides what is really “Deviant”? Just because you don’t like it, doesn’t make it a wrong. Telling people that that certain sexual practices are unconditionally dirty, or depraved, or perverted, does not make it deviant or make those desires go away. But it can have devastating effects – can make people hide from their friends and family, can make them hate themselves, or hate others out of jealousy for others' relative freedom. It can stifle their self-expression and hinder their relationships. And most importantly, it can shut down the lines of communication and force people to relate to their sexuality in ignorance, insecurity and fear. I have gay friends who have suffered a lot and some who continue to suffer. 

If you are the types who think sex outside marriage or ‘same-sex’ sex is bad, at some point even the most self-loathing person in the world is going to have sex. Because all they have to do is cross that line. Strike up a conversation with someone attractive and before they know it, they could be having sex. As a society, we really cannot stop or control what happens between two willing humans. 

As a species, we are sadly stuck in a limbo. We must encourage these poor souls that all they have to do is cross that line and assure them that it's not a sin. A reminder that in spite of all the things that tell you not to have sex, you can still have the desire: and there is nothing wrong with exploring this desire with a consenting adult, as long as you keep your eyes open and your head clear. 

Sexual liberation or sexual license? Sex has always been meant to be enjoyable and diversionary and consensual, and to each, his or her own. Don’t let stupid bigots or right-wing religious zealots stop your carnal pursuits. Live and let live. Make love, lots of it!