Wednesday, June 29, 2011

20 Sly Rules to Live Your Life!

My 20 Rules (in alphabetical order)

1. All rules are meant to be bent, stretched, twisted, mangled and broken.
2. Always expect the worst, hope for the best and be prepared for the rest.
3. Always have ten or twenty good different reasons for everything.
4. Daydreams are like lottery tickets, you rarely win them.
5. If it doesn't need saying, don't ever worry about it.
6. If it needs saying, don’t ponder, just say it.
7. If you have to make excuses, remember what you are doing is wrong.
8. If you like to do it, don’t care, just do it.
9. Luck is what you want it to be and it’s rare
10. Never cry when you can laugh, it’s much easier.
11. Never ever run when you can just walk.
12. Never give them, those wicked souls the pleasure of your distress.
13. Only fools believe the Government.
14. Only textbooks, comic heroes and heaven are ideal.
15. Time is relative. Watch it!
16. To err is human, to admit it is very, very divine.
17. Treat your enemies as though they know all your darkest secrets.
18. Watch your back. Always.
19. White lies rot into black lies within 2 hours or 2 days so beware.
20. Yes, Descartes, we do really exist.

Monday, June 27, 2011

My Secret Day Off!

I want an extra day in the week. But not one for everybody, just for me, something like a 30 something version of Ferris Bueller's Day Off. I want a secret day off which only exists for me, a super secret hidden day in which I can get some work done without being interrupted or having to deal with anything. Or a day which I could sleep in and laze about without suddenly finding myself back at my office, yet barely caught up in my sleep.

And while I'm talking about impossible dreams, I want to be able to go to that elusive gym and work out to the point where it really feels like work without having something ache for 36 hours afterward. Of course, getting off my derriere a little more frequently might be a pretty good cure for that.

Ugh... I have to get back to work. Someday, maybe I'll be able to finish all of this and keep my blogs a little more frequent.

Anybody reading this want to pay me truck loads of money to just be so wittingly smart, sexy and clever? 'Cause this capitalist 'make more money' mantra sucks.

Friday, June 24, 2011

Out of my Mind!

Maybe I'll Be Back in 5 Minutes

Things have taken a mystifying and out of the ordinary turn for me, lately. So, I'm going to be taking a little time away from here, I think. For a few minutes, hours, days whatever. Well, at the very least. Who knows, though? Could change my so-called mind in any of a dozen ways in an instant.

Life is a really strange place, no matter where you live it: in the "real" world or in a virtual one. And even more so when you live your life in your head, for the most part. My life goes on in my mind and, often, this "real" world of blood and sweat and universal laws seems to be only a place to survive, not a place to live. That's upside down and backwards, really, but that's the way my head works.

So, I'm going to go sit in my mental penthouse for a while and try to sort out the junk. Just think of me in my scruffy blue jeans, eating chicken sandwiches and making piles of what to keep and what to throw away. I'll come downstairs, occasionally, to pick up the mail, pay the bills and maybe answer the phone too, so, if you want to talk to me, drop me e-mail. I'm going to go, for now but I will be back! Be seeing you.

Monday, June 20, 2011

Taking a Break!

With Friends for Company!

Sometimes I just get asinine for no apparent reason I can pin down. Usually alternative rock or spellbinding electron trance,and at times, the company of old friends in a good mood... whatever it is, it's helluva fun but these days all too very rare.

Too often creatives like me live in tiny utopian boxes, and we all get so used to staring at the shiny walls of our own inventions and self-imposed confines of our offices that we completely forget that this isn't the real big picture. Though we won’t readily admit, we all pull down and bury ourselves in hard monotonous 9 to 9 work – copywriting, designing, wireframing, strategizing, brainstorming, all the catchy keywords that you associate with a creative hotshop.

So when we take that break, I jump up! Hey, it's kind of cool out here with the mad folks - a temporary relief from all the bad vibes of a bad day. Not as a steady diet, maybe, but for an evening of fun, it's... well, good fun. Get me lit enough, add a few friends, the right music and I'll stand on the bar deck and sing Def Leppard or dance insane steps at the disco floor. Heck, I don't even have to be drunk on alcohol to do it. Drunk on gaiety will do.

So this weekend while discussing the recession and laughing my head off with an old ‘transnational’ pal over dinner in the city’s current hottest pub, I noticed that the single geek at the bar table next over was trying hard not to stare at us. Poor fella: crouching over his laptop, fiddling his cellphone and visibly bothered that the pretty girls at the adjacent lounge were all laughing and talking about politics, sex, music, art and beer while he sat glum faced in solitary isolation. Obviously, the poor guy needed a break, a few more beers himself and definitely, someone for company!Pity him!

P.S: By the way, since this time, my friend mentioned here has vanished without a trace. If anyone knows what has became of Sid Thomas from Sydney, I’d really appreciate knowing.

Sunday, June 19, 2011

Advice Unwanted

How Strangers Can Ruin Your Day!

Who are these people? I'm working my butt off on some project and some stranger comes along and watches me, then tells me all about exactly how I'm doing it wrong (or at least not the most competent way), how I ought to do it, what I ought to be using and how much I've already screwed the project up by doing things incorrectly so far. Where do these idiots come from and why do they think I give a damn? What makes them believe I give them and their unwanted opinions any kind of credence at all?

And yet, I will stand there hypnotized, nodding astutely and saying "that's what I thought". Vomit. What am I thinking? What I want to do is smack them upside the head WWE style and say "Shut up! If you're so damned experienced and skilled, you do it, 'cause I've got stuff I'd much rather do." Certainly, I have other things I'd rather complete than listen to them spew out... like whatever blasted project I'm knee-deep in when they inexorably come trodding in!

Now, I don't mind my friend coming along and making "misery loves company" jokes as I labour along, since I've seen him head-down over some wretched project many a time. He's earned the right to razz me a bit and I've razzed right back a time or two. That's fine. But these... people… just arrogant prickly rats?

My teacher at School used to lecture me about "the right tool for the job" when I was a kid. Most of the time, the right tool for my job has been a word processor or a pen and a notebook. What do I know about tools? Well, I do know which end to hold onto and that the tool should be doing the work, not me. So, I plod along when scraping paint and sanding wood and things of that nature, letting the tools do the work and listening to other bitch about how slow I am.

And, of course, the free-advice folks seem to be most attracted to the slow-moving workers, as if doing your work at a firm and agreeable pace means that you're in over your head and that you need their unwelcoming and supposedly unbiased help without delay.

Actually, I don't. I prefer to make my own mistakes and learn from them, not make someone else's mistakes and then be annoyed. Bugger off you irritating chatterers. If I screw up, you can laugh all you like, but please don't say "I told you so," because I'd prefer it if you didn't tell me in the first place. Want to help me out? Keep your mouth shut. simple!

Sunday, June 12, 2011

Donnie Darko 2001 (+ Directors Cut)

Richard Kelly’s Inventive Exercise in Surreal Teen Angst

I just finished reading Richard Kelly’s “The Donnie Darko Book, a fascinating addition to the inventive 2001 time travel cult hit - Donnie Darko. The magnetism of Donnie Darko which originally saw a very limited theatrical release but a subsequent fantastic run on DVD and Cable, lies not really in its focal stars – Jake Glyllenhaal, real life sister Maggie Glyllenhaal or Jena Malone (who plays Rocket in Zack Snyder’s Sucker Punch) nor in its hypnotic subtle special effects, serviceably effectual as they may be. Although, we have to admit Patrick Swayze's turn as a slimy motivational speaker is wickedly genius, easily his best performance since Point Break, the Kathryn Bigelow directed Keanu Reeves smash hit)

No, Donnie Darko simply works because it's completely original even with its sci-fi undertones. Its portrayal of late-1980s suburban American disquiet and crippling teenage perplexity is so authentic that a talking six-foot tall metal-faced rabbit named Frank is rendered only slightly less than completely plausible.

Donnie Darko succeeds because of first-time writer/director Richard Kelly’s (who went to make the equally surreal Southland Tales) complex script, which - at once candidly determined, mournfully delicate and strikingly intelligent - is also wise enough to make Donnie's parents caring and insightful, knowing that need not preclude the troubled kid from hating them. It works because Jake Gyllenhaal (in one of his best performance since October Sky and Bubble Boy) brings a restrained, tormented charm to the primary character of Donnie. And not to mention and this is the aspect that will haunt you afterwards - the stellar music of Michael Andrews and the befitting 80’s new wave soundtrack including "Mad World", the haunting No.1 Gary Jules piano-driven cover hit of the Tears for Fears single.

By portraying so honestly the time in which it’s set, Donnie Darko captures a dreamlike world of feeling and detail that transcends time, which is what the movie is all about in the first place. Or is it?

Present below are Video links to the original version and the extended Director's Cut which was released in 2004.

Free Streaming/Download Avi Links :

Donnie Darko (2001) Original Version : VeeHD or StageVu
Donnie Darko (2004) Directors Cut : VeeHD or StageVu

Gary Jules : Mad World (Tears For Fears Cover) : Youtube Video

Saturday, June 4, 2011

An Apocalyptic Wedding Invite

Thanks to Ellen Forney for the inspiration, designed this wedding card for a friend of mine. What better way to celebrate our mutual love for Zombies and Graphic Novels!!
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